ok so i havent written long enough for no one to be checking this anymore. to tell you the truth i havent had thoughts that were able to be censored enough to put on a blog. funny to say i guess cause i should be able to write whatever i want but lets face it, there are amny things i think that i just dont want people to know.
so im done highschool, thats pretty fucking awesome. i squeezed trhough math with an even 60% but i got 91% in chemistry hehe. i dont really like talking about my marks but suffice it to say that it kinda gives me faith that i can do the science program next year. well not my math mark. i ahve to basically reado 536 in the pre cal next year but unfortunatly i would ahve had to do that anyways because i need to choose the easiest courses to get eh highest marks. I HATE THAT TEH FUCKING R SCORE MEANS I HAVE TO THINK OF SCHOOL COMPETITIVELY. i am not a competitive person. the only cmpetitve bone in my body shows itself when im arguing with people and thast jsut becasue i canb e damn stubborn. now not only do i have to do my best, but my best has to be better then then other peopels best! all to get into mcgill, where i will spend another 4 years minimum of gruelling work to get my degree in zoology. at least its not 7 eyars like i heard before thatts REALLY REASURING. the ironic thing, well i think its ironic is that once i get my degree im barely gonna use it. i mean i'll use the information but ill most likely be very overqualified for my jobs. i'm jsut gonna volunteer or whatever, travel be an animal activist bastard, see all the big forest before they're cut down, live around aniamls. really thast all i wanna do. if i could make some kind of improvement in teh world in teh process that would be cool too, but i jsut need to be around animals an care for tehm. i know i know you can call me a crazy hippy vegan now, as if i ahvent heard it a milion time..bastard.
considering all the cool things coming up this summer: Folk fest in saskatoon, camping etc.. right now i gotta say i wanna punch a whole in teh wall. fuck i love lemons you throw them at things and they only make a little mess and make teh whole room smell good. becasue i am my sappy sentimental self the whole idea of things cahnging again is shocking. i mean i know everyone says hey i met the best friends in teh world in high school and were nver gonna loose touch and tehy mean so much to me. and most of the time that pure shit. everyone has there stories about all te stuff they've gone through with every one and how meaningful it was. maybe i an jsut add myself to the ranks of dumbshits that go on about the meaningful friendships in highschool and so one, but i think i'd be more of a dumbshit to think that these friends ships havnet meant anything. thres been poepl who meet my closest gorup of friends and are slightly afrain of how well we know each other. we are infact insanely insinct. not to say that they dont occasionaly drive me crazy. i dunno, im not sure what did it. i know that thinking back in teh past 5 or more years of my life i can track down exaclty how i became friens with these people and what has happened to change them and me. and i know for the msot part when drastic changes happened we stuck with it and now we are still friends. i think that says alot. i also know that as the eyars go on the numbers thin out. i've lsot touch wiht some people i loved adns till love, and it absolutley kills me. i mean i still talk to them but there are times when things cahnged too much or too fast and there was nothing we could do about it. it scares me to think that there are friends i have that no matter how much i love them things could afde away. then tehyre are friends who i jstu cant go without talking to for an extended period of time without feeling all fucked up. i dont know where im going with this or wahtever. i jsut think that tongiht im gonna sti back and remmeber some of teh shit thast happened. it's wierd i feel like i;ve lived enough for a lifetime. i already feel teird, when really i havent even begun living. i guess its jsut that you live teh same thigns over adn over. your life i guesss is really just a series of repeted emotions in different situations, but each time they get more complex untill your literally dying in your own thoughts. FUN